Kim Kardashian Tries to Befriend Kate Middleton. Fails.

There's been so much tension in the cafeteria that is Pop Culture High lately.

Queen Bee (well, Duchess) Kate Middleton can't just enjoy her British lunch without wannabe Kim Kardashian trying to sit with her and her classy friends these days.

Doesn't she know it's Wednesday and that royals wear pink on Wednesdays? Kate just smiles primly every time, but what she's really thinking is, "You can't sit with us!" For the remaining days, they wear outfits that are flattering, so there goes the rest of the week.

Now Kim is taking it old school: she's writing Kate handwritten letters and then slipping them into her locker.

Since both mamas-to-be are due in July, Kim felt she and Kate have some kind of unwritten maternal connection. "When Kim found out the pair had similar due dates, she got incredibly excited," a source told Daily Record.

She wished her the best with her pregnancy and attached a small gift.

Kate, however, hasn't written back. Oh, don't worry, child. She's gotten the note all right. Again, she just hasn't written back. It's like when your crush texts you and you don't respond for 9 hours simply to prove that you can wait 9 hours to respond to said crush. Kate has all the power.

She also hasn't written back probably because the note was a little unfocused and crazy and signed "Love, Kim Kardashian."
The source reveals that Kim had her PA (because nothing says personal than having your personal assistant write the letter out for you) give advice about their child's shared Zodiac: Cancer. How to decorate a Cancerian baby's room with "rubies and moonstones" and "all the icons associated with the crab."

"This was a piece of advice she was particularly keen to relay to the Duchess of Cambridge and was a little saddened not to have received an immediate response," the source added.

This isn't the first time Kim has tried to befriend Kate. Last year she lent her some clothing from her Kardashian line, but Kate sent it back upon arrival. It's not palace policy to receive unsolicited clothing from designers. This is more uncomfortable than that time Kate wore a fascinator and then the very next day Kim wore a fascinator and Kate avoided making eye contact with her in the hallway. Awkward.

Kim keeps extending BFF olive branches to Kate left and right, which the Duchess constantly turns away. Someone should just be a friend and clue her in…Kim, stop trying to make "fetch" happen. It's not going to happen!
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